Noisy Balloonist Blog is the apprentice

I bought a TV that’s bigger than God’s wang. See below for size comparison:

For those of you protesting that God is female, you’re probably right. But equipment-wise, God’s definitely a hermaphrodite. After all, she’s God.

This 37-inch, 1080p liquid crystal colossus is so fucking bright it could substitute for a lighthouse. I touched its HDMI the other day. It has two. I think it’s trying to seduce me.

I am vaguely ashamed to possess a thing that so stinks of wealth.

Digital television come in decimals, little shavings of spectrum with names like channel 7.1 and channel 52.3. I was ignorant of these new developments in fractional watching. This means I get the Funimation channel, and that’s pretty sweet. Dubbed. Bah.